I like the food at J Street.
I tell my parents I go to church every week, but I haven’t been since last March.
I masturbate while my roommate is asleep.
I pretend I smoked before I came to GW, but I didn’t.
I’m from the Pittsburgh area, but I’m rooting for the Packers.
I called UPD on my neighbors, and they never found out it was me.
I caught an STD on move-in night.
I see hundreds of people in the day, but my day is never complete unless I see him.
